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zekroms

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× Uno. [Audio / Action for Goldenrod Rocket Base]

[Xanxus sure wasn't expecting to wake up back in Johto; and in a Team Rocket uniform, no less. He may have been willing to tolerate this if he had his old Pokémon on him, but nope, they're all gone now. All he has is a shitty level 15 Bagon and an even shittier level 5 Koffing. Further inspection of his stuff reveals that all of his badges and old items are gone, as well. Unamused does not even begin to cover it.

Since he can't turn on the video while he's dressed like this, he'll just use the audio function instead.]

Which of you shitheads has my fucking level 100 Pokémon? I want them back. Now.

[The others don't matter as much to him, so whatever, the dumbasses who are stuck with those fuckers can keep them.]

And Killua, Belphegor, Lussuria: I want to know where you are, if any of you are even still fucking here.

[Once he's done with that, Xanxus immediately gets up from his bed and, instead of just opening the door like a normal person, kicks the goddamn thing off its hinges, causing it to fall over, and storms out of the room to take his anger out on anyone who's unfortunate enough to run into him. Oh look, he's probably already one step closer to being fired!]

Current Location: Goldenrod City

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× Quindici. [Text / Action for Goldenrod]

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!!!!! ♥♥♥♥♥

[Yes, that... really did just come from Xanxus's PokéGear. And it really is him typing.]

I hope everyone has a great day today! Even if you don't have a lover to celebrate with, you can always celebrate with your friends! Friends are *~*~wonderful~*~*!!!

[Someone, please. When this whole happiness thing wears off, beat Xanxus to death with the sharpest and heaviest object you can find. Who cares if he won't actually stay dead, don't ever stop doing it.]

Oh yeah, did anyone else wake up to a Pokémon egg and chocolates this morning? I'm not sure if it's a gift from someone or it's just one of those weird things Johto does. Either way, it's just fantastic!

[Fortunately, that's the end of that terrifying text message.

Aaaand anyone who happens to be in Goldenrod today can find Xanxus walking around the city... happily... He's actually being nice to people today, so take advantage of this moment. And if he already knows you, he may just crush you in a hug, even if he's usually an ass to you (which is about 99% of the population anyway).]

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× Quattordici. [Video / Action for Saffron] Fourth Wall Post!

[Oh boy, a fourth wall event that Xanxus is actually conscious for! Like many others who have regained lost powers and weapons and whatnot, his Flames of Wrath are now fully functional once more, and his X-Guns and box weapon have mysteriously appeared on his person as well. After having gone almost an entire year without them, he finds it very, very strange. He's happy that they're back, but it's still weird.

On the video feed, Xanxus can be seen playing with his flame, which is completely engulfing his hand and flaring rather violently. He shoots a couple fireballs to make sure that they're really working to their full extent. Standing behind him in the background is a large, white-furred and red-eyed lion with similar flames coming out of its mane and paws. It looks like it could pass for a Pokemon, but it really isn't one at all.

Once Xanxus is completely sure that his flames are working again, he turns his attention to the camera and asks just one simple question.]

What the fuck is going on here?

[Yep. That's all he wanted to say.

Anyone in the Saffron area can either find him in the city messing with his flames some more, or on one of the routes nearby, testing out his guns. He missed these beauties so much. Xanxus hasn't even noticed yet that his roster of Pokémon has changed completely...]

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× Tredici. [Video / Action for Goldenrod]

[Xanxus is back on the network, looking unamused as usual; however, the outfit he is wearing is completely different from anything he's ever worn before. Today he is donning this kingly outfit minus the shirt, because just look at that thing, it's hideous. So enjoy the view of his scarred and muscular abs. To further add to his oh so manly and kingly image, he's even got a matching staff that he is currently tapping against his free palm idly.]

It has come to my attention that there is a despicable young woman who claims to be the "only ruler of Johto," but I assure you all that what she says is nothing but lies! The one and only ruler of Johto is me, the King of Hearts! There is no one better fit to rule this land than I am! I do not and never will have a queen reigning beside me.

Now, I demand that you filthy peasants offer gifts to honor your new ruler, the true ruler of Johto! Anyone who refuses to do so will lose their head!

That is all. You may go back to your pathetic, miserable lives now.

[And then Xanxus's Dragonite shuts off the feed, who has been giving his trainer the most unsure look throughout this entire thing.]

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× Dodici. [Video / Action for Goldenrod]

[It’s a beautiful, sunny day in Johto today; perfect day to have a massive egg sale! In the center of Goldenrod City, anyone who happens to be passing by will spot two men sitting at a stand, and behind them are two enormous piles of eggs. They’re practically as tall as mountains… well, maybe not, but they’re really fucking huge, okay. And even if you’re not in Goldenrod, you’ll see them anyway, because there’s an unknown cameraman broadcasting this to the network!

One of the men, Xanxus, isn’t even looking at the camera and is just typing away on his PokéGear with his feet propped up on the stand. However, the other one, Layton, is looking at the camera with a pleasant smile... that can't be seen because he's wearing a face mask since he is sick.]

Good afternoon, Johto. I do hope that everyone is doing well today.

[He pauses for a moment to cough.]

As you can see, Mister Xanxus and I have quite the number of Pokémon eggs over here. After some discussion, we have decided to breed our Pokémon for others here in Johto.

[The camera pans slowly in all different directions to show all the multi-colored eggs in each pile. Aren’t they pretty? Once it’s done, though, the camera focuses back on Layton.]

We will be including a list in text form of the eggs we have available shortly after this feed.

[Which is what Xanxus has been working on this whole time. Aaand some more coughs from Layton. Why did he have to insist on giving out the eggs today...]

I am willing to part with these eggs for no charge if you are able to provide them a good home and care.

[And then the camera shifts to Xanxus as he finally pipes up, though he’s still not looking at their audience.]

Unlike him, I’m not some fucking charity case. Pay the full price for my eggs or you’re not getting any.

[Layton gives Xanxus a brief look, but he won’t even comment on the foul language or overall rudeness. Not like he ever listens, anyway…]

Yes… Mister Xanxus will be including his prices in the list, as well.

[And now the camera is starting to zoom out. With one last cough from Layton.]

We look forward to doing business with you all, and I do hope you have a wonderful day.

[The camera finally turns around to reveal who has been filming this whole time; Xanxus’s Gardevoir! Yes, the very one that was publically assaulted by his trainer just last month as a Kirlia… He strikes a sexy pose for the camera and winks before shutting the feed off.]

(( Egg claims are over here! This list is essentially what Xanxus’s text message looks like, minus the actual claims, of course. There are still plenty of slots left, so if you haven’t already claimed an egg, you can still do so! Just make sure to leave a comment there and wait for confirmation before you comment to the IC post!

And of course brown text is Layton, and red text is Xanxus. Replies will come from either/both of us, depending on who you’re getting your egg(s) from or what your character is saying. Even if your character isn’t interested in getting an egg, they can still comment if they really want to! ))

Current Location: Goldenrod City

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× Undici. [Text]

[Shit. Xanxus had a feeling that this day would come someday, but he never thought that that day would be today. He found it suspicious that all of Squalo's stuff was suddenly gone, so he decided to go to the Pokémon Center to check his PC and see if he had any unexpected additions to his box. And he did. He found a female level 74 Tyranitar whose OT is recorded as Superbi Squalo. Xanxus didn't even know that he had a Tyranitar like this one. But there's no doubt about it; it used to belong to Squalo. Now it belongs to Xanxus.

He knows that Squalo had a lot of friends in Johto, so as his boss, he figures he should break the news to everyone.]

Squalo's gone.

[Short and to the point. That's all Xanxus is going to say on the matter.]

(( Haha, sorry for posting again so soon. |D;;;; ))

Current Location: Goldenrod City

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× Dieci. [Video / Action for Goldenrod]

Take the goddamn stone.

[Xanxus can be seen holding out a Dawn Stone to an irritated-looking Kirlia, one of the new members of his party. It must really not want to evolve into a Gallade, because every time Xanxus gets closer with that stone, it does a graceful leap out of his range, much to Xanxus's dismay, and glares at him with its hands on its hips.]

Take it, you piece of shit.

[And then the Kirlia uses Double Team, producing many clones of itself and they all twirl around in a taunting manner. Xanxus is pretty pissed off by this point, so he literally throws the Dawn Stone right towards the real Kirlia's head at an incredible speed. Amazingly enough, it manages to teleport out of the way right after the stone leaves his hand. Upon impact, the Dawn Stone completely shatters into hundreds of little fragments on the ground. They actually look quite beautiful, sparkling in the sunlight like that. The Kirlia admires the pretty mess on the ground for a moment before turning back to Xanxus, the irritated expression replaced with one of awe and fear.

The man's bone-chilling glare is still on his face, but it seems less vicious. Xanxus didn't expect at all that the Kirlia would be able to dodge an attack like that so easily, so he's almost proud of it. Although he's still not pleased about it not wanting to take the Dawn Stone, but oh well. He doesn't feel like buying another one and going through this same ordeal. He'll have to settle for a kickass male Gardevoir.]

...Fine. Have it your way.

[He turns around and starts heading back to his Goldenrod home. The Kirlia just stands there staring for another moment, but its expression slowly develops into a pleased one and skips after its trainer.

This scene has been brought to you by Drapion Productions~]

Current Location: Cianwood City

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× Nove. [Text]

[Someone just got his Storm Badge and realized neither of his Flying types can carry him very well... Why does Xanxus have to be so damn tall. Even his Charizard can barely handle him.]

Are there any Flying type Pokémon that aren't fucking puny? Mine are too short to fly me anywhere.

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× Otto. [Video / Action for Goldenrod]

[Well. Xanxus found a rather unexpected gift in his PC just a few moments ago. Unexpected and unwanted. After checking its stats with his Gear, he discovered that this Pokémon used to belong to his now departed subordinate, Belphegor. A good boss would look after his subordinate's Pokémon for him; however, Xanxus is not a good boss. He doesn't want this thing.

The video starts up to show Xanxus with an adorable little Furret on his shoulder, who looks as happy as can be. Too bad she's about to be given away.]

Who wants this piece of shit. It's at level 30.

[That's all the information Xanxus feels like giving at the moment, so you'll have to bother him if you want to know more.]

(( Despite what this looks like, no, this is not a free giveaway, haha. If you really want this Furret, you'll have to bribe Xanxus with money and/or awesome Pokémon~ He's not that generous. First person to give him a satisfactory offer gets it. If you're not in Goldenrod, he can have his Noctowl send the Furret over to you and you can just give her the payment. |Db She won't leave you alone until she gets it, so don't even think about trying to rip him off.

You can find more detailed information on the Furret here~ Just scroll down to his box.

The Furret has been claimed by Tohru Honda! ))

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× Sette. [Video / Action for Goldenrod]

[Well, Xanxus has finally recovered (mostly) and is out of the Pokémon Center now, so today he's in the Goldenrod Department Store! Anyone who has seen Xanxus before should notice that he's no longer been wearing that business suit he's had on ever since he got here; he's now wearing something much more casual and suitable for this random heat wave. Just a simple dark purple, collared t-shirt with khaki shorts that go down to his knees. And shiny new sneakers. Yep, he just bought this outfit today, and he has a few more in the bags on his arm. As well as his icky, dirty suit.

Now, it seems he's looking at swimming trunks. As he picks up a pair to check what size it is, a cackle can be heard from behind the camera. Without even looking, Xanxus says:]

Turn that damn thing off.

Geeeengar~

[YOU'RE NO FUUUN, MASTER. But whatever, she'll listen. The feed is shutting off now.]

(( Anyone else who's in the Department Store is free to run into him~ ))

Current Location: Goldenrod City

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× Sei. [Action for Goldenrod || Backdated to April 5th]

[Fucking finally, Xanxus has made it to Goldenrod. It feels like an eternity has passed since he left Azalea, though that could mostly be because he... hardly got a wink of sleep throughout the entire trip because he was so determined to beat Tsuna here. Because he's a weirdo. The night he had actually planned on getting some sleep was the night that the flood started, so because of all the water on the ground, Xanxus couldn't set up his tent. And of course, it finally stops right when he gets to Goldenrod. Whatever higher power rules this place must love him.

Anyway, anyone who happens to be out and about in Goldenrod right now may find a tall, soaking wet man in a suit with dark rings under his eyes and is almost zombie-like. It doesn't help that Xanxus's default expression is a lineface. You may also hear him hacking away and sneezing every now and then; this is what happens when you stay out in the rain for days. He's too stubborn to go to the Pokémon Center, though, and instead seeks out the inn, but he can't see straight between the severe lack of sleep and the fever. Xanxus isn't even really sure where he's going, nor is he sure how much longer he can stay conscious. But he's just going to pretend that everything is just fine and hope that he doesn't attract too much attention.]

(( Professor Layton has dibs on taking Xanxus to the Pokémon Center, but other characters are more than welcome to bother him and at least attempt to help him somehow, but try to drag him to the Pokémon Center and he's getting the fuck away from you. Or there's also the option of telling him he looks a freak or laughing at him because he looks like a wet puppy. Whatever you want! Layton's thread will take place after everyone else's (Ichi is tagging in a few days late anyway due to her hiatus). ))

Current Location: Azalea Town

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× Cinque. [Video / Action for Azalea]

[So. While Xanxus was training his Pokémon today, a certain Pokémon of his... randomly evolved. The Pokédex never said that this Pokémon could evolve again. What the fuck is happening? Camera's going over to this mysterious Pokémon now for everyone else to see.

He's not complaining, of course, but this is just really weird.]

What the fuck is this? It isn't even in the fucking Pokédex.

[Observant people may also notice that Xanxus is playing with his recently acquired Hive Badge in his other hand.]

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Interrupting your pretendy funtiems for a quick announcement~

Now that Xanxus has less forward-dated posts clogging up the page thanks to dropping out of a game a little while ago, I finally decided to give him a voicemail post! If your characters ever need to contact Xanxus ICly for whatever reason ~~not that anyone would want to, BUT JUST INCASE~~, feel free to hit it up.

That is all!

Current Location: Violet City

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× Quattro. [Video / Action for Violet]

[The camera shows Xanxus standing outside the Violet City Gym, who is broadcasting to you lovely people today to do the obligatory showing off of shiny new badges!]

Finally got this stupid badge. Fran, hurry the fuck up so we can leave.

[Beside Xanxus appears to be an impatient Piloswine, who is sniffing his trainer's briefcase as if he smells food in there. Asshole, he just won your badge for you, give him food now. 8| The Piloswine pushes against the briefcase as a hint to Xanxus, but he just holds it away from him.]

...I need a new name for this guy, too.

[After his Pokémon's performance in today's battle, Xanxus feels that his Piloswine is finally ready to move up from the "Trash" nickname now. But he has no idea what to call this one.

And that's all he has to say, so he's going to disconnect now. Xanxus is very blunt and to the point today.]

Current Location: Violet City Inn

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× Tre. [Video]

[The video feed suddenly turns on to reveal an egg sitting on a bed next to a Noctowl, who is staring at it with morbid curiosity as the shell begins to crack and twitch slightly. Soon enough, a baby Charmander emerges from the egg!]

[But the first thing he sees isn't the Noctowl beside him. He's looking in the direction of the bed next to him. The camera pans over to show the viewers what exactly is on that bed; it's a sleeping Xanxus, sprawled out on the bed and fully dressed in his suit. Even his shoes are on. Someone was tired when they got home from work.]

Char! Char!

[The ecstatic little Charmander seems to be calling out to him and edging closer to the bed, but the two beds are too far apart for him to jump across, and it's too high up for him to jump down. Xanxus isn't waking up, either. Cue sad face and teary eyes. He wants his Mama!

There's a glint in the Noctowl's eyes, and she gives a couple hoots to get the Charmander's attention before she hovers over him and grabs his tiny little arms with her talons and lifts the baby Fire Pokémon, flying over until they're hovering about two feet above Xanxus's sleeping form. The Noctowl lets go and the Charmander lands right on the man's chest, the impact being hard enough to awaken him. He sees the little Pokémon through half lidded eyes and immediately thinks what the fuck is this. Then Xanxus notices his Noctowl descending onto the bed and cocking her head in the direction of the other bed. What used to be a whole egg sitting on that bed is now a little pile of broken shells.

Whoa, everything makes sense now.

Xanxus lifts up the Charmander and slowly sits himself up, taking a good look at the Pokémon. He can feel the heat radiating from the flame on his tail, and he has to admit that the Charmander is... kinda sorta cute.]

Chaaaar!

[The Charmander extends his tiny hands toward Xanxus and looks up at him with an adoring smile, while Xanxus's expression is pretty much a tired lineface. Why the fuck is this thing so happy? But whatever, he holds the Charmander closer and awkwardly pats his head. Charmander seems to be enjoying it, though.

Then it occurs to Xanxus; since he knows what this thing looks like now, he can go look it up on his Pokédex and take a look at his evolved forms, as well. He starts to get up, still holding the Charmander in his arms, but then he looks straight into the camera and stops. And now he's scowling.]

Turn that fucking thing off.

[The camera flips around to show who's been filming this whole scene like a pro; Geodude! The rock Pokémon snickers and seems pretty fucking amused as he finally ends the feed.]

Current Location: violet city

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× Due. [Action for Violet || Backdated to Friday afternoon]

[What the fuck happened for the last five days? Because Xanxus has no fucking clue. He walks into Violet City and then bam, his memory goes fuzzy. Now he finds himself waking up in one of the beds in the PokéCenter, and his "travel buddy" is nowhere in sight. Not that he minds the alone time; he quite likes being away from Fran. Sadly, though, Xanxus will have to find him at some point.

After he lays in bed for a while longer due to feeling irrationally exhausted, Xanxus drags himself out of bed and checks himself out of the PokéCenter because like hell he's staying here any longer. He doesn't mind submerging himself in the cold weather wearing only a suit (he never bought himself proper winter clothing); he's just glad it's not snowing anymore. Xanxus is just going to wander around until he finds the inn, not caring that people are giving him strange looks for not being bundled up in this ridiculously cold weather. Considering he was out in the wilderness for six whole days while having to deal with the snow, he's not really bothered by the cold anymore.

Once Xanxus gets to the inn, he plans on doing three things: get a room, eat, then sleep forever.]

( OOC note! )

Current Location: New Bark Town

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× Uno. [Video]

[Oh hey there, people of Johto. Have a pleasant shot of an angry man in a suit, sitting on a bed while his Magikarp flops around on the floor nearby.]

Karp... karp... karp...

[It's pretty obvious that the poor thing is suffering. Further annoyed by the incessant "karp"ing, Xanxus gives the fish a swift kick, which sends it flying into the wall. The Magikarp lands on the ground with a thud and finally shuts up.

With that taken care of, Xanxus shifts his gaze back to the screen.]

Where the fuck are my weapons.

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ATTENTION FAILBOATERS

This journal is now being used for

route_29. If you no longer wish to receive updates from this journal, then please friend remove getmesomewhisky or

getmesomewhisky. If you don't want to, then... happy stalking. |Db

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012 [Text]

[Xanxus has been bored out of his mind countless times on this ship, but this time... this is just ridiculous. The boat usually isn't this uneventful. To keep himself from going completely insane, he has decided that it's about time he puts his awesome weapon-making skills to work. The last masterpiece he made was his guns, and that was many years ago, but he still remembers the basics of weapon-making.]

Who wants custom weapons?

[This is a once in a lifetime opportunity, failboat.]